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Topaz Mommy met my lucky contest winners!

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This was such a lovely evening! I met the winners of my recent giveaways, one here on the blog and one over at my Facebook page. That's Rocel at left and Bella on the right. Rocel won the Crosswinds Resort Suites giveaway while Bella won the Sheridan Palawan Resort giveaway on my Facebook page (and that is why you should like my Facebook page!).

I was supposed to send them their gift vouchers but when I asked them for their addresses, I found that we were all neighbors! So serendipitous! So I asked them both to just come on over to the house for a little dinner party. They both said yes hooray!
Oops! Sorry for how I look! I had a stressful day. Iñigo's yaya decided to up and leave that day. So I was running around like a headless chicken, getting her documents ready, checking her things, etc etc. And of course I had to do all that while caring for Iñigo since she was focused on packing and leaving.

Okay, that's a story for another day. But I felt a bit embarrassed that I had really special guests coming over—my dear blog readers!—and I looked like a mess! I didn't even have time to brush my hair! I was also planning on cooking my famous spicy tuna pasta for Rocel and Bella but, well, it didn't happen. So I just ordered pizza. Hardly impressive. Buti na lang Rocel brought ensaymada and the best chocolate crinkles ever while Bella brought this adorable cake.

The 3M is Bella's three boys. They came over and played with Vito. Rocel has a little girl but she stayed home. Here's all of us moms and boys.

Thanks for coming over to claim your prizes, Rocel and Bella! Thanks for the dessert and, best of all, for the great conversation. I had such a nice time! It didn't feel like meeting each other for the first time. I felt like we'd known each other for so long, that's how comfortable we all were. I should do this more often!


What happened at the SM Babies launch

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Good news, mommies! SM decided to glamorize their baby offerings with adorable but still affordable baby things. They gave this new line a simple and quite prosaic name: SM Babies. To launch this, SM Babies got some cool mommies and their babies for a photo shoot. To see the gallery, go to the Facebook page of SM Babies!

Anyway, I was invited to the chic launch at the Manila Peninsula. The theme was high tea so guests were encouraged to come in pretty dresses and to wear the fascinators that were enclosed in the invitations. I love wearing fascinators! I wish it were de rigueur here. I'd wear fascinators and hats all the time!
Here I am with ARC PR's Krissy and Kira.
Cute, stylish, comfy, formal, casual. SM Babies—they've got it all for your baby!
I love the preppy sweater and jeans combo!
I had to take a photo of these mannequins. They look so much like Iñigo!
Businesswomen moms! That's (from left) Rone of Mothering Earthlings, Cai of Paper Chic Studio,
Jen of Next9 Baby and Karrots of Live, Love, LOLz. 
Celebrity mom Andi Eigenmann with her daughter, Adriana. She's upset at all the bright lights
and strangers that swarmed around them. Poor baby.
SmartParenting.ph interviews Andi.
Moms on the panel. Host Issa Litton interviews Lexi Schulze (my former boss!), Amanda Griffin and Andi Eigenmann.
Christian Bautista serenades the mommies.
With the Smart Parenting magazine staff.

I mingled a lot. I've been around apparently. I knew people from magazines, websites, blogging, newspapers, PR. I mingled so much, someone thought I was the brand manager of SM Babies! Well, I'm not haha but it did dawn on me that if I ever should make Topaz Mommy into a brand, I already know a lot of people who can help me! Very encouraging!

Anyway, SM Babies is such a cute new line. I'm definitely checking out the collection when we go to SM Megamall next week. If you see me and my kids, say halloooo!


My family loves Pr1mera drinks!

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I'm so excited to share with you my latest find! At the start of the year, I got boxes and boxes of Pr1mera Fruit-Vegetable Powder Drinks. It's in keeping with my resolution to be healthier. We've been drinking tons of sugary drinks since... forever! Sooo bad especially since Vince and I come from families with diabetes.

Now, one of my favorite PR girls, Vangie, is so sexy. My jaw always drops when I see her post photos of herself on Facebook. So I asked her what she does and she said this and that and then she said she drinks Pr1mera juices. She said they were health drinks that didn't taste like health drinks haha. So I got interested and tried them out.
It's been a month and I can say that these drinks are the bomb. They taste great! And I feel healthier. My kids got sick a few weeks ago—a nasty cold and cough that lasted about 10 days! My poor babies! I got hawa soon after but I didn't suffer as much. Mine was just 4 days. And I think mine wasn't so bad because I kept drinking Pr1mera.

Pr1mera has what they call their Power of 8 Formula. That's nutrients from eight herbs and veggies (malunggay, carrots, saluyot, dahon ng sili, talbos ng kamote, barley, spirulina and chlorella growth factor). There's enough vitamins in one packet to meet your daily requirement—so perfect for those of us who don't eat enough fruits and veggies!

These are my favorites so far: dalandan, guava and guyabano. They are so sarap! They don't taste yucky at all. Lalo na the guyabano—it's so good! The juices are sweet but not scary for those on a diet or for diabetics. That's because the sugar is derived from the fruit itself. And there's no artificial sweeteners, too.

I also have a cup of Kofi every morning. This one naman has mangosteen and Omega 3. It kinda tastes like roasted latik, though, not really coffee. But masarap pa rin siya.

Anyway, I still have boxes of Pr1mera drinks to consume and maybe I'll give a review of those, too, soon. Meanwhile, Pr1mera asked me to tell you moms to try out their products and maybe earn from them. Here's how...

Pr1mera Global is a direct selling enterprise. The examples I can think of is Avon, Amway and the like. So if you'd like to try these health drinks, they aren't available at your local supermarket. You'll have to buy them from a dealer. Or you can be a dealer yourself.

Here's what a dealer gets: a bag of all the drinks and a maximum income potential of more than half a million pesos a month. Woah! That's a lot of money. Pr1mera told me that of course kikita ka lang ng ganyan kalaki if masipag ka magbenta at mag-network.

A start-up business kit starts at just P1,888. Here is the complete product line up:

Just to be clear: I am not a Pr1mera dealer. I'm not selling these drinks so please don't ask me details about the business. You can check out their Facebook page to find out more.

Pr1mera has a website but you have to register to see anything. They ought to fix that since it's not very user friendly—curious people want to find out more about the brand first before they commit to anything, right?

About Pr1mera as a money-making venture, I won't be able to say much except that it looks like a good opportunity, especially for mommies who want to earn a little extra. About Pr1mera as yummy health drinks, however, I can attest to the fact that they are refreshing and delicious!

Photo dump!

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I have more giveaways coming up but let's take a break from all that brand business and talk about what this blog is really about—my little boys!

I have hundreds upon hundreds of photos of Vito and Iñigo but these will do for now. Just want to share random stuff my kids have been up to these past few weeks. I usually post photos on Twitter (it's immediate!) so do follow me there. 

Vito running around in Bonifacio High Street.
Vito built this garage for his cars.
Vito watching a Toy Story clip on my computer while Iñigo explores the LEGO tub.
Dear Iñigo! Even his tears are round!
Where's the baby? Thanks, Kat, for Iñigo's cool onesie!
Vito, Mozzarella Bear and Woody enjoying our new bedsheets.
Iñigo enjoying brunch with mommy and her friends.
Vito trying on my nail polish. He saw me painting my nails and wanted his done, too.
Iñigo enjoying photo shoot of Cristina Gomez, soon on my Manila Bulletin column!

I love how my life now is so full of my kids and my friends and yet I am working full time, too. It's so wonderful I've been able to find that elusive balance. It's not easy. Every day is a juggling day but I can't complain. I really can't complain!

Meet Amway's cleaning solutions for your home

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Amway sent me their household cleansers a couple of months ago and we've been using the products religiously. Now, here's my review!

Amway Home is a collection of products that are super-powered to clean your home but are safe for you and your environment. They use the Bioquest Formula with ingredients derived from natural sources, are biodegradable and dermatologist-tested. Plus, they are in super concentrated form so you only need a little to do a lot of cleaning!

SRP: Php 910
The bleach did an okay job but when it came to really tough stains, well, let's just say chemicals really are stronger. My sons use cloth diapers (Next9 and Baby Leaf) and poop stains are pretty hard to remove. We had to soak the diapers longer and scrub harder as opposed to the usual bleach, but eventually the stains did fade.

I don't know if I'll still use this bleach since it's harder work and more time spent doing the laundry, but because it's for kids' diapers, maybe. I like to use super safe products on stuff that touches their skin, especially the most sensitive parts. But I dunno.

SRP: Php 360
The multi-purpose cleaner did a great job with stripping away oil, grease and grime. The house really felt clean. As in super clean. All manner of stains were removed! Our only complaint is the smell. It's masangsang.

SRP: Php 585
And this is the dishwashing liquid. This is what we're happiest with. The dishes and pots and pans were really squeaky clean! But it may be tough on grease but it was gentle on yaya's hands! It's a super concentrate so just a few drops can clean a lot of dishes. So super tipid siya. We like the smell, too. And we like that there's nothing in the dishwashing liquid that's chemical so I can use it even on the baby bottles, bottle nipples, etc etc!

Amway Home is available only from authorized direct-selling dealers. Call (012) 812-4184 for details.


Trollbeads for the creative mommy (yes, it's a giveaway!)

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Happy Valentine's Day, mommies! To celebrate, Topaz Mommy and Trollbeads are giving away a bracelet to a lucky mommy reader!

I'm so excited because moms will love a Trollbeads bracelet—it's so perfect for celebrating milestones. Trollbeads is the original bead-on-bracelet brand from Denmark. They say that every story has a bead, and you can craft your own bracelet with beautiful beads for each beautiful memory, making your bracelet unique. It's your story!

Here are a few sample beads that moms will love:

 

Here's my starter Trollbeads bracelet that I got for free (thanks, Trollbeads!):
Wraparound leather bracelet.
Fill up the entire length with beads!

Want your own free Trollbeads bracelet? Well, bring out the artist in you! Because each Trollbeads bead is a work of art, we want you to show the world how creative and crafty you are. So do these steps:

1. Share photos of yourself being crafty with your kids on your Facebook profile. Add a short description (i.e. "Decorating cupcakes with my two girls," "My kids and I are making a scrapbook of our vacation," "Painting my little girl's room with rainbows!") 

2. Like the Facebook page of Trollbeads Philippines and Topaz Horizon.

3. Tag Trollbeads Philippines and Topaz Horizon on your photo so we can see your entries. Only one (1) entry per reader will be accepted.

Sample entry: "Decorating cupcakes with my two girls because I'm a creative mommy and I want to win a beautiful bracelet from @Trollbeads Philippines and @Topaz Horizon!"

Trollbeads will announce the winning lucky mommy on their Facebook page one week from now. That's next Thursday, Feb. 21. 

There's no need to campaign for your photo to win (hooray, you don't have to beg your friends to like your photo!). Trollbeads will choose the creative mommy. Winner will then visit the Trollbeads store in Robinsons Magnolia (soon to open in Glorietta, too!) so she can choose the beads of her personal stories. Have fun creating your stories!
 
To know more about Trollbeads, check out their official Facebook page or visit the official Trollbeads website.

Happy birthday to the father of my children!

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To the man who encouraged my dreams and pushed me to succeed, who believed in me when no one else did...

To the man who wrote me poetry, serenaded me with his guitar, and read bedtime stories to me over the phone long long ago because I couldn't sleep...

To the man who kept asking me to marry him for 7 years, and finally married me, then gave me a beautiful home, and keeps it orderly and fixes all the broken things...

To the man who was and still is so madly attracted to me despite my pimples, white hair, crazy hair, sick days, fat days, flatulent pregnant days, and horrible post-partum days...

To the man who makes me laugh every day and makes our kids laugh every day and is just about the funniest, smartest guy I know...
To the man who gave me my beautiful boys and is such a hands-on father to them and is the only other human being who loves them as much as I do (possibly more since you're more maalaga than I am!)...

Happy birthday, my dearest Vince! Thank you for the love and the laughter!


There's no such thing as a Gruffalo!

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Well, actually, yes, there is, and the Gruffalo is here in Manila! Raaaawr!

Vince, Vito, Iñigo and I went to our first ever play as a family last night when we watched The Gruffalo at Rockwell Tent. We had such a great time! Little Vito, all of 2 and a half years old—was so affected, he kept rushing to the stage whenever Mouse was in danger! The other kids had to be restrained, too! It was that good!

The Gruffalo is all about Mouse who went to the deep dark wood in search of nuts. She meets Fox, Owl and Snake—and all of them love a tasty rodent for a snack!—but she scares them away with a made-up monster called the Gruffalo. But is there such a thing as a Gruffalo?

Find out with your family and see the play yourself! The play is a West End musical adaptation of the children's book by Julia Donaldson and Axel Scheffler. I like it because it's about imagination, quick thinking and courage in the face of danger. I want my boys to value those!

The Gruffalo definitely made an impression on Vito. When we asked him if he liked the play, he gave us an enthusiastic nod and a "Yeah, yeah!" That's so great! Can't wait to take him to see the musicals in West End! Vince and I did that on our honeymoon and loved it immensely. It's nice to see that our kids appreciate it, too.

You must watch The Gruffalo! Bring your kids! We did and we had so much fun. It's on a limited run here (only this weekend!). The tickets range from P900 to P2,200 but Rockwell Tent is so small that even if you get the cheapest tickets, it's fine. We got the second row and Vito still charged the stage anyway. So did the other kids. After a while, since your kids are out front already to see Mouse and her adventures up close, it kinda doesn't matter where you sit!

Buy your tickets from Ticketworld now! There's a great promo right now: Buy 3 tickets and get an extra one for free. So if you're a family of 4 like us, go watch it now. If you can't watch the play, do buy the book! Happy weekend, mommies!

P.S. Thanks, Daphne and Alicia, for this treat!

P.P.S. I know the kids look upset in the pictures haha but that's because this was when the show had ended and they were looking forward to ice cream but their blogger of a mommy just had to insist on taking pictures!



What my boobs are for

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On Facebook last week, Chronicles of a Nursing Mom posted the story of Kathy Chua-Grimme. She wanted to breastfeed her baby girl while they were out shopping at Festival Mall. But since there was no breastfeeding lounge and because she was gawked at by other shoppers, she was forced to retreat to a toilet stall and sit on the floor to nurse her baby.

A lot of mommies sympathized with her and said she should just use a nursing cover or borrow a shop's dressing room or hide in a quiet restaurant. Other moms called for Festival Mall to build a breastfeeding lounge while commending other malls for already installing nice nursing rooms.

This is how I feel about it: Whenever and wherever you are, just pop out the boob and nurse your baby!

I know how Kathy feels. I have nursing covers. I have special clothes with built-in flaps so I can cover my baby's face. I wrote to Power Plant Mall to ask them to build a breastfeeding lounge (Power Plant's Tin Coquiero told me they are now building two!). I have been there—trying to feed my baby while covering myself up and getting stared at by people, knowing that they're not thinking, "Oh, what a great mom she is!"

I struggled for a while. It was especially difficult when the boys didn't want to hide under a cover anymore. They wanted to observe the world as they ate. How do I breastfeed and be modest at the same time?

You know what, I just realized and embraced that the two don't belong together. A mother shouldn't have to think about modesty or being decent or offending other people. All a mother should be thinking about when her child is hungry is, "My child is hungry. I must feed him!" No hiding, no shame.

Bottled Up! from mire molnar on Vimeo.

You know, I never had boobs. I was a flat AA. That's flatter than flat. That's almost concave! Then I got pregnant and now I have breasts. Obviously, they're not for sex or for my husband's pleasure or so I can look good in V-cut tops. Those are just the happy by-products of having swelled up mammary glands!

But the real reason I have breasts is so I can feed my children the best possible food I can give them. Any biologist or scientist or doctor will tell you that breasts are for feeding your young. So when my children ask for milk, I have to feed them. Don't take that away from me. Don't take that away from my kids!

Plans and dreams and hopes

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Is it possible to love someone you've never met? A little boy that I've loved since I first read his story on The New York Times died last week.

I have loved Ronan since that sad evening I learned that he had Tay-Sachs, a fatal genetic disorder, an incurable disease. His mommy, Emily Rapp, said she didn't expect Ronan to reach his third birthday. True enough, Ronan died aged 2 years and 11 months. He's just a few months older than my Vito. Maybe that's why I'm so affected.

After I read the article, I spent many nights weeping over Ronan as I read Emily's blog. Finally, Vince told me to stop reading his story because I was then 2 months pregnant with little wee Wiggle and Vince didn't want me so upset. "It might affect the baby," he said.

So I put away Emily's blog, rose above my grief, went about my life, enjoyed my Vito, gave birth to Iñigo, ended my magazine career, began a new one, but Ronan stayed with me. In very many ways, Emily and Ronan's story changed how I parent.

Many parents ask me what our plans are for Vito and Iñigo—where will they go to school, have we checked out preschools, have we bought education plans, what do we want them to be when they grow up. Do we feed them organic food, are we enrolling them in music classes, dance classes, gym classes. When I just smile and say, "Oh, I don't really think about those things," a lot of the parents are dismayed at me. I guess, because of this blog, I have inadvertently built this image that I am a parent who wants nothing but the very best for her children, and for me to say that I don't really think—and therefore don't really care—about those things destroys that image.

I am a mommy who does want the best for my little boys. But I have learned from Ronan's life and from my mother's death that there is only one thing certain—that the future ends in death and I must love the people in my life today, while they are still here, while I am still here. I didn't do that for my mother. It is my only regret.

I don't plan too far ahead. I think it's a waste of energy. My plans for my sons involve only what they will eat for their next meal, if they'll go to the playground, if they'll take a bath. So if the plan was to eat squash but the kids suddenly decided they wanted nuggets, then nuggets it is. I spoil my children silly because I always have this terrible thought that this will not last forever. Happily, Vince doesn't have my baggage. So he's the normal parent—he insists on a routine, he piles the grocery cart with yogurt and bananas for the boys, he checks the developmental milestones, he does Papa Preschool, he mulls over good schools, he saves for the rainy day, he dreams, he plans, he hopes. I am grateful my boys have their father.

I do nurture dreams, but they are dreams that my boys will grow up to be wonderful men, happy with their choices, whatever they may be. I tell Vince, "I only have one dream actually, that I will like my kids and that they will like me." Yes. I love my kids, sure, but I also want to like them when they grow up. For example, I know my parents loved me but they didn't really like me—I was way too different from what they thought a daughter, a woman, would be. They didn't understand me, and you can't like what you can't understand. But they loved me, and that's all that really matters.

My hopes are only concrete in this: I hope desperately that Vito and Iñigo will be safe and healthy. I am very specific when I pray: "Protect them. Keep them safe from harm. Make them invisible to evil. Don't let accidents and sicknesses touch their bodies." Then I launch into a long list of what I hope God will protect them from: open windows, slippery floors, table corners and edges, the bath water, sick kids on the playground, accidents brought on by their exploring, impatience of their yayas and even their parents, and so on. Other than that rather specific list, I have learned to let go of every other hope. My dreams for my boys are vague. My plans are only for the here and now, and the plan is to love them every moment.

So I'm a strange mother that way. Maybe some of you think I'm a bad mother that way. But my sons are happy and healthy. They like shouting with joy. The days are always reverberating with exuberant shrieks. They are always tumbling all over me, Vince, each other, laughing. And their happiness and health are enough to convince me I am a good mother. For now. I'll worry about tomorrow tomorrow.


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If you would like to help fund research on finding a cure for Tay-Sachs disease, kindly donate here.

Good-bye, dear Ronan. Thank you for teaching me to love my sons.


*photos from Emily Rapp's blog, Little Seal 

Doppelgänger

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It was doppelganger week on Facebook last week. I don't really care to know which famous personality I look like (I've heard the gamut from AiAi delas Alas to Dayanara Torres). All I care about is someone really adorable looks like me.

I guess this means I'm cute! Happy weekend, mommies and daddies and babies!

Befuddled mom-to-be? Anmum to the rescue!

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I wasn't expecting to be expecting when I was expecting. So when the preggy stick confirmed I was indeed expecting, I panicked. I was living quite the unhealthy lifestyle when I found out I was 5 weeks pregnant. I may not have been doing drugs or drinking alcohol but I was smoking, sleeping late, and skipping meals (plus, when I did eat, all I ate was junk). I was terrified for my baby!

My OBG back then prescribed prenatal vitamins plus Anmum Materna. He was concerned that I was so skinny. At the same time, he assured me that I shouldn't worry so much since, to my great benefit, I found out I was preggy very early on. Most women don't know they are with child until the third, fourth, even fifth month! So in my case, I can still fix my life so my baby (perfect little Vito, as it turned out!) can be nourished.

If you're trying to have a baby (or even if you're not but you're having sex), you should make sure you're getting enough folate in your diet. Folate in the very early stages of pregnancy means your child will be spared from brain and neurological defects and even cleft lip and cleft palate. So get folate-addicted! That means eating tons of green leafy veggies, citrus fruits, papaya, beans, peas, lentils, corn, liver, peanut butter, and folate-enriched bread. Seriously though, who eats all of that every day?


Anmum has a spankin' brand new website that will help women trying to conceive, are pregnant, and are new mommies. For example: the one-minute folate test. Very useful! It told me my current diet is woefully inadequate. While Vince and I have decided we're happy with two babies, we aren't exactly saying no to more. So maybe I should drink Anmum again! Haha.

Anyway, I like Anmum's website because back when I was pregnant the first time, I didn't really know a lot about being pregnant. And I'm a smart, educated woman! It was a really scary time. I wanted to know everything about pregnancy, child development, good health and nutrition, childbirth, parenting!!! It's a good thing I can afford books and I have 24/7 access to good websites. Many women have nothing but their moms, aunts and kapitbahay.

Yep. I said it. Look, the women before us are great but they came from a time when they believed in paglilihi. They didn't breastfeed. They loved formula milk. They believed in stuff like wearing necklaces will result to your child's cord wrapping around his neck in utero or putting laway on your baby's forehead will cure colic. Ya, cute stuff. Harmful stuff.

There have been tons of research since then and while it's polite to listen to the women before us, I also believe our pregnancies should empower us to be knowledgeable about our bodies, our children, our health! Yes, be polite pa rin. They'll bristle if you make kontra. They'll say, "Dami mong alam ngayon. Bakit, pinanganak naman kita at okay naman ang labas mo!" So don't be a smartypants. Just smile and nod and then do what your doctor says!

However, doctors can't attend to our every concern every hour of every day. So mommy websites are a huge help. I depended on Babycenter, Dr. Spock, What to Expect and other similar sites and forums to help me navigate the turbulent waters of pre-mommyhood and especially when I became a mom. So it's great to know that Anmum created a website for us Filipina mommies, too!

There are useful tools like an ovulation calendar. There's the panel of Anmum experts—OB, nutritionist, pediatrician and parenting expert—who can answer your many mommy questions. Plus there's a mommy community! I love online mommies! Like I once said before on this blog, my online mommy community helped me more than any other person or book ever did!

So let Anmum be your first step in the greatest journey you will ever take! Start your healthy pregnancy today by visiting www.anmum.com.ph. Like Anmum Mommy Circle on Facebook and follow @AnmumPH on Twitter.

Ask and it shall be given you (but ask specifically!)

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I believe in prayer. I tell ya, when I pray for something, God gives it. Of course, you have to pray with the knowledge of who God is. For example, I know that God is my provider so to ask Him for financial blessings and food is okay.

As Matthew 7:11 says, "If you then, imperfect as you are, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give good things to those who ask Him?" My goodness, my husband and I spoil our kids silly. That gave me a profound insight on who God is—He will shower me with blessings because I am His child. All I need to do is ask!

I once asked for makeup when I was still so very poor and God answered by making me win a L'Oreal contest. One year's worth of makeup, y'all! But when I asked for makeup, it was because I was starting out in my career and I wanted to look good and I just didn't have money for makeup or nice clothes. So I bared my heart to the Lord and asked.

I believe that if you ask with a humble heart—not a vain or proud or greedy heart—God will give you what you want. After all, didn't He say, "I am come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly," in John 10:10? Abundance! That doesn't mean simple life, all I need, just enough. It means overflowing with blessings! That means more than I need!

I do also believe that when you ask God for something, you have to be specific. I don't mean that God is obtuse and isn't smart enough to figure you out. But He does have a sense of humor. I'll let this little conversation with fashion blogger Tracy Ayson of Fashion Fangirl explain my point:

So believe in God's promises, know who He is, ask with no fear or hesitation, ask with a heart full of love and humility, but ask specifically! God bless you!

Mommy peg: Jessica Alba

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Jessica Alba. Wife. Mother of two children. Businesswoman. Actress. Hot. Stylish.

Sigh!

I'm off the pill so I may or may not get preggers this year. But if I don't get pregnant, I want to look like Jessica by the time Iñigo turns 1 this May. Oh wait. That's just 2 months from now. Okay, let's rephrase. If I don't get pregnant, I want to look like Jessica by the time Vito turns 3 this August. Five months. More than reasonable, right?

Let's do this!


*image from Refinery29

Biggest accomplishment today!

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I know I've been missing here for a while. My schedule is crazy, moms. I love it! It's a schedule that revolves around the husband and the kids. Every day, there's also work—photo shoot, interview, meeting, writing. I'm a busy working mommy and I love crossing out items on my to-do list. But of all the stuff I accomplished today, this is what I'm most proud of:

I filled up a 5 oz bottle with my breast milk all in one sitting! 



My problems with the Kasambahay Law

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Hi mommies and actually anyone who has household help! Are you following the Kasambahay Law? Do you even know there is a Kasambahay Law (hehe)? What do you think about it?

I recently sat down with my household staff to discuss the law with them. After a long talk, here's what we think of it:

Mabigat siya financially sa employer because of the many benefits—SSS, Philhealth and Pag-IBIG (Article IV, Sec. 30). The total is a minimum of P791 per maid. I'm actually okay with giving benefits, kahit na aaminin ko na masakit ang extra P1,600 sa monthly budget. To affluent families, P800 a maid is negligible but if you're struggling to make ends meet and need a yaya for your kid, that money could buy milk and eggs and bread!

Pampabigat siya sa schedule ng employer kasi kailangan mong asikasuhin buwan-buwan ang benefits. Plus, you need to register your household help with your barangay (Article III, Sec. 17). Okay lang kung sa opisina kasi may HR, may admin staff, may messenger. Sa bahay ko, it's me and me alone! At least ako, housewife na so I actually can devote one day a month to this. Paano if may trabaho ka? "Boss, leave po ako bukas kasi kailangan ko pumunta sa bank, sa Philhealth at sa Pag-IBIG para bayaran yung benefits ng yaya ng anak ko. Next month din po and every month after, one day leave po ako." Nyek.

The government must make a way to make the administrative burden less for us. My sister-in-law says the SSS people give her a hard time every frakkin' month. Pipila ka na, ang daming ng forms, ang sungit pa nila sa iyo. Stress! Ugh. So government. I wouldn't mind paying for my help's benefits if everything's online and from one bank. Parang bills payment!

Actually, ang SSS may ganun na. Click here. Of course, if nag-resign si yaya or you fire her, you again must file papers to say that she's no longer with you or else babawasan ka pa rin buwan-buwan. Or you'll be penalized for not paying her contributions.

Yaya doesn't want day off. Yaya Juliet doesn't like going on day off kasi napapagastos lang siya. Her family kasi is nasa probinsya lahat so she doesn't have anyone here in Manila. She also actually likes working. She doesn't like being idle!

But according to the law, the yayas must have 24-hour day off every single week (Article IV, Sec. 21). I actually like days off kasi that means a day of privacy for my family. In fact, my previous maids used to come in Monday mornings and leave Friday afternoons. So they only slept here 4 nights a week and the weekends are blissfully private.

But si Yaya Juliet ayaw niya nga mag-day off. Okay lang before but when the Kasambahay Law took effect, sabi ko sa kanya, "Juliet, sorry ka na lang pero kailangan mo talaga umalis ng bahay ko once a week. Yun ang sabi ng batas." Sagot ni Juliet: "Yang batas na yan, sasagutin ba niya yung gastusin ko sa araw na day off ko?"

You can't just fire a yaya. (Article V) Dapat may "gross habitual neglect and inefficiency." So if nahuli mo siya na hinampas niya yung anak mo, wag paalisin—dapat warning muna. Habitual means paulit-ulit. So kung nahuli mo a second time, hindi pa habitual yun.

The law does say you can fire a yaya if there's willful disobedience, fraud, willful breach of trust, violation of terms of contract, and commission of a crime against you and your family. So what I'll do is I'll draft a contract that specifically lists all cases wherein I can fire her: saktan mo anak ko kahit isang beses, magnakaw ka, nag-chismis ka about my family, etc. I'm still thinking of all possible scenarios.

The law also says you can fire yaya if she has a contagious disease (Sec. 32, f). This is a relief to me kasi I had two yayas who had TB pala. Because I didn't want to be hardhearted, I paid for their initial treatment and even gave them 2 weeks' paid leave. Ano ginawa ng mga yaya? Naghanap ng ibang trabaho at hindi na bumalik. Sayang yung pera ko. So now I know I don't have to help them financially; I can just let them go.

So I like that there's a contract! The problem is this...

Yaya doesn't want to sign a contract. (Article III, Sec. 11) Juliet didn't get to finish high school and she is inherently suspicious of contracts. Mostly because she believes they are drafted against her. And if you read my above statement, yeah, I agree since a contract must protect me, too.

So if ayaw niya mag-sign ng contract, does that mean we're breaking the law? Does that mean she's not officially employed (and therefore no benefits)? And yung contract ba dapat pa-notarize? Kasi if papa-notaryo ko pa yun, dagdag lakad at gastos na naman yan!

The law has illogical terms. This is my favorite: It says if yaya wants to go to school, employer should adjust the family's schedule to accommodate (Article II, Sec. 9). Nyek. What if her classes are from 8am-5pm? Paano na?

Well, sabi naman ng law the education shouldn't hamper the services required by employer. But the law also says "employer shall afford the domestic worker the opportunity to finish basic education." May elementary and high school classes ba sa gabi? And if meron, yaya is also required to have 8 hours of rest (Article IV, sec. 20). Are her classes considered part of her rest period?

Yayas don't want a raise anymore. My yayas are happy with their salaries kasi they are much higher than what the law stipulates (Article IV, Sec. 24, a), which is just P2500 a month. They're even happier that under the law, ako ang magbabayad ng benefits nila in full, hindi kami hati. But when they found out that once their salary hits P5000 a month, split na kami sa contributions and they have to pay taxes.

Panic sila. Ayaw daw nila mag-contribute at magbayad ng buwis (who does???). Since Juliet is about to hit the one-year mark, I told her she'll get a raise. Ayaw ni ate. Paano ito? So, hooray, this is great for me, right? But I'm scared she'll leave us if I don't give her a raise. So, no, it's not good for us at all.  

I am forced to choose the better-off yayas. I recently hired a new yaya for Iñigo. We love her! But I was choosing between her and another girl. They were both perfect for me but, because of the law, it was easy to choose. I chose Josie, the yaya who already had her complete documents. NBI clearance, medical  clearance, birth certificate, IDs, etc. Jenny, the other yaya, said she is very poor and cannot afford to get her documents. Now, according to the law, the employer is supposed to shoulder the pre-employment costs (Article 3, Sec 12). So I told Jenny ako na bahala. But then Josie showed up with all her documents.

Put yourself in my shoes: Josie means she can start right away and wala na ako gastos. Jenny means more gastos and a waiting period kasi I have to wait for her to get all her stuff. And nangyari na sa akin yung binayaran ko na lahat ng medical ng dalawang yaya before and we found out may TB at hypertension sila. So after all I spent and all the time I waited, I didn't get to hire them anyway. I needed a yaya ASAP so I got Josie.

One of the yayas' benefits: Meeting stars regularly! 

The law is not all bad. It's actually got some good parts like giving yayas a nice and safe place to sleep (my yayas said some of their friends sleep in the garage, beside the car!). The yayas and I have also compromised on some areas. For example, si Juliet, yung yaya na ayaw mag-day off, sabi ko I'll send her to cooking classes every weekend na lang. May day off na siya, may opportunity to learn pa! As for the raise, Juliet suggested kung pwede same salary pa rin and bigyan ko na lang siya ng "allowance" so she won't have to pay taxes. I haven't said yes to that yet since I want to ask a lawyer if that's legal.

Yes, I am actually going to talk to a lawyer about this (for a magazine article) and I hope our concerns can be cleared up. I like to think I'm a smart girl but I don't really understand legal stuff. So I really truly hope all our fears are unfounded.


Pia Guanio-Mago on Smart Parenting

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Hello, mommies! I'm a regular contributor to Smart Parenting but I'm especially happy with this month's issue. I interviewed new mommy Pia Guanio-Mago! It was truly the most fun interview I've had with a star.

I like her honesty. She's no holds barred when it came to answering my questions. She even revealed stuff she shouldn't have had! For example:

I’m going to confirm. You married Steve Mago December 2011. Yeah. Yes. December? No, October.
October! Kasi someone said December, someone said October. Did you get married twice? Actually, we did get married twice so I’m just as confused as you are. We got married, the first time around... December ba? I think... Wait nga (dials phone, laughing). We had a renewal of vows. It was the craziest thing, a year later, because the first one was a very simple ceremony, it was just with our family. 
(On the phone with Steve) Babe, the first time we got married was December? December! Was it December? Don’t kill me. October 10, diba? Ah, October 1. And then the next one was October 20. Because we have October 1, we have October 10, which is our anniversary, tama? O see? So 1 talaga ang o-obey natin? O sige (laughs). Because Frances said wasn’t it in December and parang my whole world became... 
...December. Then I read October... (To Steve) October 10. Ah, October 1. 10 is our anniversary as a couple. Ang dami kasing October dates. October 1. Kasi remember you have a [delete! delete!] na password? (laughs) 
Off the record!(To Steve) Okay, okay. Sige, bye-bye (laughs).
Funny girl! That was just the start of the hour-long interview. You can imagine how silly we got as we progressed. It wasn't all silly. Pia was serious, too. She talked about the shock of motherhood, how it wasn't what she expected, how a crying baby reduced her to tears too, how breastfeeding is so frakkin' painful but that she's still pushing through with it because it's the one thing she can share exclusively with Scarlet. 

She also talks about prioritizing marriage and family over career and getting back her sexy body. What I really found refreshing is how Pia said she never planned on having kids but when she had her baby, she just dove into motherhood and loved it. Sounds like me!

Here's a little peek at the cover shoot. If you want to see better photos and read my fun story on Pia, grab the March issue of Smart Parenting now!


Shell Journeys: Our quick Tagaytay adventure!

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It's definitely summer. The heat is crazy. My electricity bill is insane! So when Pilipinas Shell invited my family to go on a road trip on their tab, you betcha we jumped at their offer asap! Our destination: Tagaytay and its brisk weather!

On the road again!
Thanks so much for the gas, Shell! Since we were going to do a lot of driving on long stretches of road, Shell recommended we use their most premium gasoline, the Shell V-Power Nitro+ Racing gas. It's the gas Formula 1 driver Felipe Massa uses in his race car! Well, not quite. It's 99% similar so yun na rin yun in my book!

When we were gassing up, Vince said he wasn't expecting any difference. Gas is gas is gas. But as soon as we turned on the ignition, our cute little Mazda 2 roared! Kalurkey! Plus, you know that part on Sta. Rosa, as you're climbing up the hills in those tiny roads and you get stuck behind trucks and slow cars and you want to tear your hair out because it's sooo hard to overtake? With the Shell V-Power Nitro+ Racing gas, we were zipping in and out! We were here, we were there! Overtaking is so easy kasi our little car is now so fast and quick to respond!

In no time at all, we were at Tagaytay, enjoying the cool breeze and this gorgeous view of the volcano.
There's our toy car, Zoom Zoom! It's the cute little blue thing. Who'd have thunk that little car can go fast? Racing fuel. Every car must have it!

We stayed at Summit Ridge Hotel. We wanted a hotel that offers a 2-bedroom suite and is near the sites we planned to visit. Summit Ridge fit the bill! It's not a fantastic hotel. Maybe 3 stars at best (my husband and I are spoiled brats when it comes to hotels). But it was nice and clean, the service was good and hot water really came out of the shower and the faucets (unlike in Discovery Country Suites sadly, but I still like Country Suites best!).
Not very big suite but it was designed well—it felt spacious. And it felt quite homey.
There's a seating area, a desk, a fully-equipped kitchen, and a small dining table.
One bedroom has two single beds. It was where my brother and his wife, Theodore and Rose, stayed.
Oh, and Vito spent a lot of time in there, too. At night, Theodore just pushed the beds together.
The other bedroom has a king-sized bed. It was quite comfy.
The room also has its own TV and balcony.
Little Iñigo was supplied with his own playpen, complete with adorable beddings. He enjoyed it! 
After we settled in, we had a little nap then we went to the mini mall adjacent to Summit Ridge. That's another thing I liked about the hotel—they had convenience in mind for their guests. I think families will like this hotel (we did) better than honeymooners or old people.

Anyway, we ate merienda at Razon's and then Vito ran around the plaza while his Ninong Theodore chased him around. We then planned to go watch the sunset at Calaruega but as we were driving, we saw the newly opened Sky Ranch. It's just a minute from Summit Ridge and right beside Taal Vista Hotel. Mommies and daddies, you have to bring the kiddies there!

I don't have photos but Vince does so click here to see them. Or you can read on after the jump...

We had an amazing time at Sky Ranch. Kainis lang kasi it's so hassle that we need to pay for everything tingi-tingi. Entrance fee, a fee for every ride, parking fee. Sana wala ng entrance fee. Or kung may entrance fee, wala ng parking fee. Then hassle yung pipila ko for each ride kasi go na go na ang mga kiddies so nakaka-dampen ng excitement ang pila. So sana there's a day pass where it's ride all you can.

I know I sound like I'm complaining haha but we really did enjoy Sky Ranch. The Sky Eye was thrilling because it was indeed very high and the strong winds made our ride very scary haha. Make sure you wear jackets, by the way. The wind is quite chilly. We wanted to stay longer but we were defeated by the cold. We had to go back to our hotel to get warm! 

Our dinner. This is arroz caldo for me (I was freezing), green mango salad, binagoongang lechong kawali and some fish dish. The food is by C2, which is one of our favorites, but the taste and presentation of Manila's C2 restaurants are much better. It was still very good, though.

Then off to bed!

The next morning, Vito woke up at the crack of dawn as usual. He's so cute because he quickly looked around to check if we were all there. "Papa? Baby? Ninong? Ta Rose? Zoom Zoom?" Once assured he's still surrounded by familiar (albeit sleeping) faces, he had ice cream for breakfast! This is the life!
Iñigo had the turon. Such a cutie! 

When everyone was awake, off we went to C2 for our buffet breakfast. Vito and Iñigo had a real breakfast now. Then we ran around the lawn behind the hotel, chased away birds, counted steps (Vito can count up to 10, hooray!), and, well, I started dreaming of a life in the country. I'm getting tired of Manila.

Okay, how did that slip out???

Don't we all have a photo by the white terraces?
Anyway, we went to Residence Inn to check out the animals. We've not been there in 20 years! My goodness, it was so nice to be back! Most places deteriorate but Residence Inn must be doing really well because it actually looks and smells better!

After we said bye-bye to the animals, we went a few meters down to the famous Breakfast at Antonio's. Sigh. I loved the place. The house, the space, the light, the views. Vito kept running around the beautiful hardwood floors. He liked it there so much! And of course, the food did not disappoint. We had large, satisfying dishes. Must go back soon!

And when we go back, we'll definitely still use Shell V-Power Nitro+ Racing gas! It's really the best gas for the open road and for long road trips.
This coming Holy Week, if you're planning to drive anywhere for a vacation, we highly recommend Shell V-Power Nitro+ Racing gas. Walang biro, it really does make a difference. There's a Shell gas station almost everywhere!

Thanks, Shell, for my family's little vacation! We had so much fun!


For more photos, just visit Vince's blog!


Quick announcement! I'll be on TV!

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If you're an early riser, turn on the TV at around 8am later today and look for UNTV. The breakfast show, Rise & Shine, will be on. I'll be there! The topic is working mom... from home! You'll finally get to see how maarte I am when I talk and hear my awful squeaky voice! Try not to hate me haha. Yes, it's that awful!

God bless mothers

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I saw this over at Facebook and cried over it because it is all so true. All of it. It's credited to author Dale Hanson Bourke, from her book, Everyday Miracles: Glimpses of Grace in a Mother's Day.

For all Mothers
(including soon-to-be mothers)

We are sitting at lunch one day when my friend casually mentions that she and her husband are thinking of "starting a family." "We're taking a surey," she says half-joking. "Do you think I should have a baby?"

"It will change your life," I say, carefully keeping my tone neutral.

"I know," she says, "no more sleeping in on weekends, no more spontaneous vacations."

But that is not what I meant at all. I look at my friend, trying to decide what to tell her. I want her to know what she will never learn in childbirth classes.

I want to tell her that the physical wounds of child bearing will heal, but becoming a mother will leave her with an emotional wound so raw that she will forever be vulnerable.

I consider warning her that she will never again read a newspaper without asking, "What if that had been MY child?" That every plane crash, every house fire will haunt her. That when she sees pictures of starving children, she will wonder if anything could be worse than watching your child die.

I look at her carefully manicured nails and stylish suit and think that no matter how sophisticated she is, becoming a mother will reduce her to the primitive level of a bear protecting her cub. That an urgent call of "Mum!" will cause her to drop a soufflé or her best crystal without a moment's hesitation.

I feel that I should warn her that no matter how many years she has invested in her career, she will be professionally derailed by motherhood. She might arrange for childcare, but one day she will be going into an important business meeting and she will think of her baby's sweet smell. She will have to use every ounce of discipline to keep from running home, just to make sure her baby is all right.

I want my friend to know that everyday decisions will no longer be routine. That a five-year-old boy's desire to go to the men's room rather than the women's at McDonald's will become a major dilemma. That right there, in the midst of clattering trays and screaming children, issues of independence and gender identity will be weighed against the prospect that a child molester may be lurking in that restroom.

However decisive she may be at the office, she will second-guess herself constantly as a mother.

Looking at my attractive friend, I want to assure her that eventually she will shed the pounds of pregnancy, but she will never feel the same about herself.

That her life, now so important, will be of less value to her once she has a child. That she would give herself up in a moment to save her offspring, but will also begin to hope for more years, not to accomplish her own dreams, but to watch her child accomplish theirs.

I want her to know that a cesarean scar or shiny stretch marks will become badges of honor.

My friend's relationship with her husband will change, but not in the way she thinks. I wish she could understand how much more you can love a man who is careful to powder the baby or who never hesitates to play with his child. I think she should know that she will fall in love with him again for reasons she would now find very unromantic.

I wish my friend could sense the bond she will feel with women throughout history who have tried to stop war, prejudice and drunk driving.

I want to describe to my friend the exhilaration of seeing your child learn to ride a bike.

I want to capture for her the belly laugh of a baby who is touching the soft fur of a dog or cat for the first time.

I want her to taste the joy that is so real it actually hurts.

My friend's quizzical look makes me realize that tears have formed in my eyes. "You'll never regret it," I finally say. Then I reached across the table, squeezed my friend's hand and offered a silent prayer for her, and for me, and for all the mere mortal women who stumble their way into this most wonderful of callings.

God bless mothers!

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